The Uptight Church Requirements
- You have to be spiritual
- If you show your flaws you've lost your walk
- In this group you look good but your get worse over time
Recovery Group Requirements
- You have to be screwed up
- If you show your flaws you're in denial
- In this group you look a mess but heal over time
Ways people grow in small groups
- 1. By suffering
- a. 1Peter 4 protect yourself by suffering
- b. A safe group is not a comfortable group.
- 2. By getting to the drivers underneath our life issues and problems
- a. Knowing how bad something is does not help us change
- b. Where is the brokenness that drives this behavior?
- 3. By learning new skills
- a. Everyone comes from a dysfunctional family and has needs due to their background. These needs will often be met in the group environment.
What produces safety in a group?
1. People feel safe when they know the rules.
2. A structured path and direction through curriculum or a knowledgeable leader.
3. Give a language. Two or three sayings that are insider language for things that are hard to communicate. It takes the sting out of difficult topics
4. Helping each other.
5. Establish group norms - a group will enforce its norms. If your group decides they are going to be sacrificial for one another then they will enforce it when members are in need.
6. Talking about where safety comes from.
Matthew 16:24-26 - one of Jesus' provocative questions, What good would it be to gain the whole world but lose your own soul?
The most critical quality of a group leader - leading from a healthy soul.
Symptoms of a diminishing soul:
Isolation
Apathy
Insomnia
Selfishness
Anger/bitterness
Being busy
Secret sins
Critical attitude
Fear
A healthy soul displays:
Joy
Confidence
Safety
Purpose
Energy
Attentive and Aware
Only you can put yourself in a place where you receive from God and if your soul is driving everything that happens in our life, leadership is inevitable and leadership is dangerous.
There is a relationship between pace of life and the health of our soul.
How does the soul interface with our pace of life?
Critical Question: How do I keep my pace of life in alignment with the current state of my soul?
Posted by: Frank Chiapperino in life change on
Jan 12, 2009
I don't know about you but one of the things I love about my small group (we call them Home Teams at my church) is that I get to see life-change happen right before my eyes.
One of my favorite stories to share is from one of the very first groups that my wife and I started. It was a group that we started for single young adults and it filled up pretty quickly as this was a growing demographic in our church.
I remember specifically it was a Tuesday night and we had a pretty good turn out, maybe 15 or 16. I don't remember anything special about the discussion but I do remember something that happened at our prayer time that I will never forget. There was a gal who had gone back to college, to finish a degree in nursing, and she had visited the group 3 or 4 times. She was admittedly not a committed Christ follower and in a place of exploration. Well, she had come back that night and interrupted someone sharing a prayer request.
She said, "I'm sorry to interrupt but I have a question. I hear all of you asking God to help other people that you know who are sick or who have problems and it makes me feel guilty. I don't want to ask God for something for someone else. I want him to help me. Will I ever feel the way you all do and want to ask him to help someone else?"
That moment in our group took my breath away. Everyone was silent. We prayed for her that night and I looked forward to every evening she showed up because our group was experiencing something fresh.
While I think there is potential for conversion experiences to happen in a group environment, I don't think it's the norm. What I have observed that happens more often is a relationship is started in the group environment that leads to a discussion outside of a meeting. Groups have the ability to enhance relational evangelism. Hopefully, relational evangelism is already a regular part of your lifestyle. Then, when your friends who are far from God are ready, you can leverage the abilities of your group. Someone from your small group may be just the right person to help your friend cross the line of faith.
There is nothing more rewarding for me than attending a baptism service at our church and seeing that person in the water and they say, "I am here because of these people." And they are pointing to their small group.
Evangelistic Group Tips:
Don't put people on the spot and force them to answer
Encourage prayer for everyone by have each person say a one sentence prayer
Find out where each group member is on their spiritual journey
Invite group members you don't know well over for dinner before your meeting
Have more than a Bible Study - do social stuff together!
Posted by: Frank Chiapperino in life change on
Nov 01, 2007
Our church is getting ready to go into a sermon series called Switch and our small groups are going to participate by using a curriculum we write to match the sermons each Sunday.
If there's one word that describes the ministry of Jesus it would be the word change. Jesus never left people quite the same way that he found them. He left some people healthier, some more hopeful, some forgiven of their sin, and some renewed. To be honest, he left some people like Judas or the rich young ruler, frustrated and bitter; but that was their own choice. Jesus never left people quite the same way he found them. For four weeks we will study and celebrate the way Jesus is still changing lives today.
Small groups are often a part of life change in our churches and if you would like to share your switch story with us we would love to hear it! You can share your story by CLICKING HERE.
